You have completed 10 years in the armed forces and you are looking for a bride, great. Now all of us looking for a bride have known that we should look for a compatiable bride, but for army folks it is far, far more significant. Wonder why? Simply because as a defence person you are likely to be away from home for long periods of time. During this long absence she could run havoc (voluntarily or otherwise) and ruin your money. I have met too many army men who do not have any financial knowledge – and combined with a wife who is a spender or ‘stupid investor’ the spouse can ruin you financially or create a great portfolio. Given her gullibility and a greedy ‘wealth’ manager in a bank or a brokerage house, she could rip you apart.

What are the tell-tale signs to look for in a fiancee or even in a wife (not too late, at least be for warned about bankruptcy!)….

  • when your to be spouse is casual about her IT return filing, even when she has taxable income
  • when she tells you that she makes a lot of money trading in shares
  • when she asks you to open a share trading account with her broker
  • when you sit down for dinner at her place and you find one cover with “Final Reminder” – seriously one is enough
  • when she laughs about her sub 550 Cibil score
  • when you see 5 credit cards in her wallet
  • when she says her father regularly bails her out of credit card debt because she went beserk shopping
  • when she asks ‘will you leverage your real estate to fund a new business idea’
  • when she admits that she has had a gambling / equity trading problem
  • when she admits that she has tried MLM and some other get rich quick ideas
  • when she tells you how she has got great returns from Chit funds
  • when she tells you that RE is a great asset class
  • when she tells you that she has no clue about investing, banking, etc. and she does NOTHING
  • when she tells you that one car of hers got repossessed
  • when she tells you that she replaces her car every 3 years 🙂

These things sound familiar? or have you not kept your antenna up? Look hard. As a military person you will be out of your house for very long periods of time. During this period your spouse could run amok with your money. So if you do not put the financial alarm bells, you may not get any warnings about your impending financial disaster…

  1. this may be case for even regular people why alone defence personnel ?

    to be honest a girl / family ready to get married to army person should be applauded and would be far more mature than what you exaggeratedly portray

    “During this long absence she could run havoc…”
    run havoc??? or you meant wreak havoc or simply run…?

  2. awesome compilation. but i think this is equally applicable for non-military scenario & with genders reversed 🙂

  3. all 3 of u are not understanding this. When you are staying with your spouse YOU can pick up the problem signals. Of credit card bills, phone calls, etc….but when the military man is away..he will know only after a lot of damage has happened. So this is true for a person who is in merchant navy or working in the Gulf, etc….too…

  4. Subra
    I dont which age you’e talking about . But I think many people wil agree that in todays age in 99% cases it is the boy who is the silent sufferer in the marriage . He is supposed to fulfil all expectations of the girl , her whims , fancies and wishes and the law is entirely in favour of her .
    I wonder whether you’ll ever write about these husbands who just have to put down their head and work all thru life in the name of family while it is the lady of the house who runs the show whether she works or not .

  5. if the husband chooses to suffer the wife’s financial indiscipline or the wife chooses to suffer the husband’s financial stupidity, it is a choice that they have made, and will suffer the consequence. Understand the context. I am saying when people stay together the signals are visible, when they are far away, the signals are more difficult to see, so more protection is needed.

  6. how many of you are understanding the context. Surya this is not about men vs women. It is about the H and W living apart from each other. So the spouse who is absent has no way of picking the signals of the financial bad behavior of the other spouse, that is all. In which age..etc. sounds as stupid as it gets. Sorry but that word was necessary. Subra sir has written about toxic wives, bad mistakes by husbands, wives, parents, ets….but this one is about living apart…

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