If you are wondering what gift to give your mother, sister, girl friend, or wife….well give them respect. Most women I know crave for respect – even at home, and even from their own kids. Most of their activities are spent in trying to earn this.

Cooking well, keeping the house clean, ….are all excuses to hear a word of praise. So read on…

I just met a 63 year old woman who had lost her parent. Even though she had a few siblings she was looking after her widower father alone. She was in a ‘old’ peoples home with hardly any friends within a nearby location. Her siblings had to fly in from various parts of the country / world.

She had no clue about either the municipal formalities, banking formalities, or anything else of her late father. She could just bank the cheques mechanically without thinking about it.

She was not a dumb woman. She had a PhD in philosophy, but had given up all that long, long ago for taking care of her demanding husband and 3 kids. Now this great husband in order to “protect” her had always provided her with a car, driver, etc. and she was completely dependant on “somebody” to go out. For her going out meant calling for a taxi – now in the place she lived there were no easy ‘phone a taxi’ . Her husband was traveling and she was alone when her father died. She was shattered – not by the grief, but she was overwhelmed with the task.

she did not access a bank account, did not use the net banking, did not use the atm, the cell phone was only for receiving calls…She could not send or receive a sms. She was reduced to a vegetable.

All her 3 daughters were married and in 3 different parts of the world. To them their grandfather’s death meant Mom was now available as a nanny supervisor. You know the revised dialogue “Mom you need not do anything, Just supervise my nanny who looks after my kids”, amusing is it not!

this is not about being judgemental. If you want your spouse (sorry, I actually mean wife) to live a happy life after your death, TEACH her about money, make a will and ensure that there is enuf money. However if she is a philosophy graduate also tell her not to sign cheques for the bank manager who is selling her a lemon. And leave her enough money that she can tell her own kids “#$%^&’ – i will not look after your kids.

You owe this to your wife, at the very least. The best diwali, eid, or Christmas gift can only be financial awareness.

We all feel for the woman journalist in the Tehelka case. Tarun Tejpal is exactly what we hate in MEN. High handed, arrogant, and assuming that he would be able to get away with it like how he got along in the past….

Do we respect / think of the cow that gives us the milk that should RIGHTFULLY gone to its calf?

Lets respect all animals too…..its time we  did…..

  1. What I find is that people who, in general, are respectful and humble are so towards everyone – men, women, animals,….It’s the arrogant ones that have different attitudes that changes depending on the people they are interacting with – boot-lick the superiors, defile the juniors, insult the ‘weaker’,….

  2. are yaar,why bring the cow and milk into an otherwise sobering blog post. what about plants and fruits.did they publish a declaration that humans can consume it?

    animals and plants are not humans.we can agree on that.not consuming milk doesnt make us more respectful towards cows. cows and humans are in symbiotic as species even if we dont realize it. without human husbandry,cows would be decimated by wild/carnivorous animals and would be an extremely endangered species . they thrive in millions,because humans decided to domesticate them and cows too benefit from it ,as a species.

  3. Can always expect @pravin to provide a unique view point.

    Wonder what women and cows / animals have in common that they have to be respected together!

  4. Do we respect / think of the cow that gives us the milk that should RIGHTFULLY gone to its calf?

    I have MIL who exactly does this, facts apart – tons of people in my family esp. Wives have suffered with sudden death to their husbands. Imagine scenario like fetching daily milk packet to gas cylinder booking and many basic tasks are lost with time and suddenly the enormity of life ahead draws upon them. Please please lets make it a point to switch roles and have the home makers expose to outside world.

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