If you want the world to take you seriously, you must first take yourself seriously!

This is a chance meeting with a few women who have made these following statements —

1. A young 21 year old kid : ‘Subra Sir I am a girl so it makes sense to do an MBA at a college near my house…so I choose….xyz college:

What a compromise that people make in life! You should only choose a school near your house – not your college nor your PG! If you think it is a compromise college, and have no respect for that college your body language will show that. It is almost impossible for YOU to respect that college. If you cannot respect that college, spending 2 years in that college is not just tough, but completely useless.

2. But Subra, I am not the primary provider: How does one react to such a statement when the woman wants to be taken seriously as a SALES professional? I expect a sales professional to be very hard driven – at age 28, not like a 55 year old looking forward to retirement.

3. I quit my job because it is a long travel: In metros this is an excuse that people use to sit at home. This is shocking. I do not have any issue if somebody without a qualification does this, but when a young girl does this – and confesses that this is because her father in law and husband are earning very well, then you keep wondering how would anybody take HER seriously.

4. I need to be at home at 7 pm: Great, then at the time of the appraisals do not expect to be appraised in the same standard as a guy (or a girl) who is willing to stay up all night to complete a project. If you cannot compare EFFORTS you have no right to compare the REWARDS. If you do, it will be to your own disadvantage. Choose what you want. Career or Comfort.

5. I will not travel: So many girls refuse to travel – I was stunned to find boys too refusing to travel – and that is really shocking. Travelling, that too travelling abroad has become a necessity. This means you need to adjust to time zones, food, culture, communication with people in other companies, communities, etc. When you choose NOT to travel you are restricting yourself to jobs that are in single location and thus restricting your market.

Girls, bluntly, if you do not respect your degrees, abilities, skills, and are not willing to work with the same amount of zeal that competitive boys bring to the job, the job market too will not respect you.

Take your pick. Career or Comfort?


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  1. Quoting from a book.

    The biggest lie humankind has told itself over the past 50 years is that success is available without effort; that effort is unnecessarily painful; that effort is not valuable, and, indeed, is to be avoided whenever possible. It is a retirement of ease, and comfort is something “you owe yourself.”

  2. Quoting from a book.

    The biggest lie humankind has told itself over the past 50 years is that success is available without effort; that effort is unnecessarily painful; that effort is not valuable, and, indeed, is to be avoided whenever possible. It is a retirement of ease, and comfort is something “you owe yourself.”

  3. A can of worms this topic …. !!! 🙂 Add complication of a child / children – and balancing home , kid , ill in-laws or parents etc …

    I find too many times Pt 4 degenerating to – Choose — Career or Kid !

  4. Points 1,2- I totally agree that the problem is to do with the seriousness.
    Point3:Quitting job based on long travel might relate even to health issues.
    Point4 &5: these points are directly related to the current support in ur family.If u have someone to take care of ur kid at home, its easy to stay up late, but what about mothers who leave der children at daycare and the daycare closes by 7 pm? Same issues in travel, am myself very much interested to travel, but had to put down the opportunity as I cudnt narrow down on how I planned to take care of my child. Leaving the child in India and travelling may be gud for people with a supporting family around. And I cudnt think of putting her in daycare in the Us since they speak english and my one year old daughter doesnt know how to respond.
    As vidya said lot of times, the question is career or kid?
    and its very difficult to answer this dilemma 🙁

  5. point 4:
    its not with women ,some people dont know the quality of life,
    career is not the only thing, good career pays you good and good pay can get you happiness and in the end what matters is are you enjoying or not ?
    by coming home early and enjoying the tea with your love ones(parents,wife,kids) gives more pleasure than working hard for getting a appraisal, your work should speak about yourself not buttering and working late.
    remember steve jobs had 4billion dollors when he died

  6. While I do agree that making excuses for an unproductive work, life, and career is never justified no matter that gender/age/or any other parameter. I think you are painting too broad. This is the kind of narrow and short-sightedness that’s responsible for many children growing into wild characters rap*** everything in their way. There ought to be the right balance that gets the work done professionally at the same time not lose the focus on right upbringing and other responsibilities at home. One doesn’t need 18 hrs of office work, where large portion is wasted in unnecessary chatter and coffee breaks, to be highly productive. If there is no exploitation, I find even 6 hrs plenty of time to finish my job and do some ground work for another days work. Being ‘involved’ in the job is only way to actually make creative progress. Only those that are too full of themselves think working ‘late’ has something to do with being driven. And only those that work late have chosen ‘career’ over ‘comfort’. Pls. get off the high and try not to lose the common touch.

  7. Modern day offices are more like slow poison. The lesser you go there, the more healthy, wealthy and wise you will be!

    Non ergonomic chairs, security check at every door, pathetic lighting, substandard quality air(not air- conditioning, but recirculated air in them) – business is just about profits, employees are parasites there.

  8. Staying late night suggest your inefficiency to complete things within stipulated time. Atleast in my house many ppl leave office by time & complete things on time & also got gud appraisal. Some guys who stayed late nights due to their inefficiency got fired

  9. PrAvEen,

    Would you be willing to share where you work? Or in case you are an employer, the name of your firm? Cos, I’d really be interested in working with an employer who fires people who stay late nights due to their inefficiency.

  10. @Arun
    I worked for an IT company in Bangalore. I personally know two guys. One guy exactly come around 9.15 to office in leaves around 6. But he completes his work in time. This guy is most sought after as he can give simple solutions to problems which others get it difficult. Ya., there will some time like release times which will be like 1 or 2 days in a month where we had to stay.
    Other guy is there who comes to offie by 10 but stays upto 9 everyday. It’s somewhat true that his project is with more work but the major factor is he is unable to cope with work and took too long then required.
    In next appraisal cycle the first guy was given gud appraisal & the second guy was fired.

    It will take time, but 90% of time managements will figure out who is smart, who is hard. Staying late nights won’t take you anywhere

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