Writing an astrology column?

The simple art of writing an astrology column or appearing on television is to write in a way that you say nothing. Let us take some typical lines (in astrology):

-those who are single will find somebody attractive to spend your life with.

– business travel could be difficult, take care of your health.

– children could bring pleasure, but be careful about their safety.

Now these are what are called ’roundabout statements’ which actually mean NOTHING. Nothing at all.

Now let us look at what some of us say on television…and why it is useless for you:

– the market is going nowhere (frankly what will you do with statement?)

-you should do a proper fundamental analysis before you invest

– the market is in an OVERBOUGHT zone / OVERSOLD…

– This is a stock pickers market (are all markets not?)

– Thanks to Greece and Eurozone crisis….the markets are in a state of turmoil (is it not always in a state of turmoil? – the Economists call it price discovery)

– Stocks are down on stock taking

– Clearly the FII money is leaving equities, but staying in the bond market (hey the numbers do not say that clearly, do they?)

-Interest rates are headed down (or up) – importantly do not give the time frame.

– but HUL missed the Analyst’s targets (amazing did HUL miss the ANALysts targets or did they get the target wrong?)

– market is down because Oil is down to $ 55 (did you not say market was down because oil was up about 18 months ago?)

– market is now cooling off from the Na Mo wave (really?)

– if BJP does not win the Delhi election, the markets can be down to 26000 levels (please change location, party and target as it suits)

….there is a virtual list out there..could write a book, but this is enough for today, is it not?

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3 Responses to “Writing an astrology column?”

  1. Overall the sentiment is negative, but we do see value in some pockets… 🙂

  2. Very interesting

  3. 1.”we are cautiously optimisic”

    lol …

    2.”markets are weak but having said that it can go up sooner than later”

    i could never understand what do they mean by ‘having said that’ & how soon is sooner & how late is later.

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