A very delicate topic…and an interesting one I guess. Also there cannot be some general rules regarding how relationships get built.
However I have heard of fathers on either extremes – those who are great and supportive and those who can leave scars on their kids. For those who have seen Anupama (an old Hindi movie with Sharmila Tagore as the heroine) ..it is easy to understand about fathers who leave a scar. I know of one girl who as 9 years old when she could not recognize her father – she was being brought up by her maternal grandmom in a different city. Then of course there are Hindi movies showing abusive fathers (belt, etc!).
However there are fathers who do not physically touch their daughters but can leave scars on the young minds. Not that I know of such cases, but it is easy to see girls who will blindly follow their dad’s diktats. To such girls my message is REVOLT. Just say NO. If he has not allowed you to do things that YOU LIKE to do…do not settle for a career or a boy that he chooses. In all probability he will choose another domineering guy who will dominate you for the next 60 years of your life!
Just Go. Get married to the guy you like, choose the career you like. After all in life you cannot please everybody always. Even if it is your Dad. If you think you need Assertiveness Training, by all means get it!
Read ‘The Man’ by Irwing Wallace – those conversations where the President is being taught ‘how to be assertive’ it is worth the effort…:)
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