It is customary for a tight fisted individual to get badgered for being tight fisted. However, if a person is liberal with money he is normally liked by everybody around him. (Needless to say him includes her).

I was in the gang of people who would rag people who were tight fisted. Till I had the following 3 different experiences.

Once I was with a friend in a big hotel. And I felt he was being tight fisted. Politeness is not my forte. He said once when he was in 6-7th standard his father was unemployed. He had seen him and his sister eating, but parents going WITHOUT food at dinner time. He realised that on one day when he found that the food was over – there WAS nothing inside.

Another experience was just as numbing. Among a group of friends this guy would ALWAYS jump to pay the bill first. Never did he give others a chance. This was hurting him, still he continued. As a financial observer I probed. When he was a kid he never had money to go to a hotel. Some of his friends would take him and say “You cannot afford it, do not pay, we will share the bill.” This hurt him so much that he now jumped to pay the bill.

The third is also quite numbing. After losing his father at a young age this boy (let us call him Arun) was brought up by his mother with great difficulty. He was the second son out a family of 3 kids. The eldest kid was a son, and the second was a daughter. The elder brother took charge of the family money and would not pay for the younger brother’s books! This kid had to use other people’s books. Luckily there was a neighbour in the same class.  He would borrow the books at 4 am and study till 6.30 am. His friend would study in the night / evening. He did Bcom because his friend and neighbour did Bcom! After getting a rank in Bcom he became a bank manager – he could not afford to his CA! Anybody can give him a sob story for books! He parts cash…..for any book!

It is easy for people like me who have not seen hunger to talk of ‘abundance mind set’, “Givers gain” “give till it hurts” etc. However if you have slept hungry even once, if you have seen your parents sleeping hungry…it is difficult to believe this – unless you see something coming your way. Only a person who has seen an elder brother not paying for his younger brother’s education can scream at a person for not making a will. ‘Hope’ they say is not good strategy! If you do not know how your children will behave after you die, DO NOT ASSUME. Make a will – share it with them only on the happening of an event!