Imagine a pyt comes to you and is selling you a complex currency and interest rate derivative. Your Director Finance and CFO do not understand the product after 3 rounds of explaining. So the pyt goes to a rating agency and gets a certificate saying this product is “Category B”.
Now the ego of the CFO and Director Finance takes over.
They have now got to accept that they understand the product! Once the interest / currency moves in a direction OPPOSITE and your company starts making losses, panic steps in.
The pyt has just put in her papers and moved to a bank – to handle a bigger desk because she brought your account (oh lala la). She just had a party for her friends in Marriott out of the bonus she received.
The consultancy company (or bank) have already shown the income in their books and justified the p/e of 50 to the press.
The CFO is anyway on notice period, because she is moving to another life insurance company to handle portfolio risk (Oh my God!).
Your Director Finance is red in the face when the lawyer shows some clauses which are patently stupid.
But you have to face the Board – not that it matters because they are all your Dad’s friends. However, one of them was your prospective father in law. He is re-considering. That is worrisome.
Your Merchant Banker has just called to reprice your rights issue. Your auditor is talking about MTM…and some mumbo jumbo about his institute. They luckily also call your Dad a member, and he is reconsidering whether to let you handle finance. That is a bother.
Your shareholders..ha ha..they watch business channels do they not? After all when an anchor tells them they should do a “fundamental analysis” before investing why did they not listen? Their fault. The should know sub prime, interest rate derivatives, mark to market, naked positions, open positions, open interest, melt down, mark down,…etc. come on they listen to it everyday, do they not?
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